Before your first child is born, everyone loves to give you their advice and opinions. They love to warn you of the negative moments that may happen when having a baby.
“Catch up on your sleep now, because once the baby is here you’ll never sleep the same again.”
“Your body is never going to look exactly the same.”
“Newborns sleep all day but tend to scream all night.”
The problem is, no one ever warns you of the absolute most negative part of parenting.
I’ve never experienced anything like it. I’m a prisoner in my own home. There’s pee everywhere. I’m constantly sanitizing everything. I’ve never bribed someone so hard in my life. I’m over it.
I’ll admit when I first tried to potty train my daughter, it was a fail. But it wasn’t her fault. It was mine.
I listened to others’ opinions and thought since she had just turned two it was something I was “supposed” to do. She just wasn’t physically ready.
“Let them run around naked,” they said.
“As soon as she pees, she will realize she doesn’t like that feeling.”
She peed every three minutes and would look down, shrug her shoulders and step right over it like it never happened. It didn’t phase her.
I became frustrated and realized she probably just wasn’t ready yet. I told myself I would try again when she was two and a half. That dreaded day came a few days ago.
I prepared this time. I had her little toilet. Her favorite M&Ms to bribe her with. Some My Little Pony underwear.
I was ready.
I was prepared for this battle.
I knew she would have accidents, I just didn’t know I would basically run out of cleaning spray.
I knew she probably wouldn’t enjoy potty training, I just didn’t realize the tantrums she would throw. Like exorcist tantrums.
The beginning was atrocious. Full on exorcism when I would ask if she would sit on the potty.
At one point I swear she turned into the Hulk and basically threw her little toilet across the room.
So many tears. It was torture. More so for me than for her!
At another point, she peed and took off running in a full sprint around the kitchen trailing it everywhere. I wanted to give up at that moment so bad. I also wanted to drink heavily but I’m pregnant, so there’s that.
Could I do this?
Was I cut out to potty train?
Could I hire someone to do it for me (This really crossed my mind)?
I was ready to pay some serious cash by the second day.
Why doesn’t anyone warn you about this?! I would definitely rather go back to those sleepless nights! At least newborns wear diapers! And what’s all this talk about, “Oh my kid was fully potty trained in two days.” Insert eye roll.
On day three a miracle happened.
She sat on the toilet and actually went and was so excited. I think it finally clicked that the toilet wasn’t going to eat her, and it was a positive event when she would potty in it.
It clicked so well that she went about seven more times in a 15-minute interval just so she could get another M&M. At that point, I didn’t even care how many M&M’s she was eating as long as she was going on the potty. (And not throwing it across the room.) There were still the occasional accidents, but I was so excited I may not actually fail at this like I previously thought.
I believe we’re on day 5 now and it’s been an extreme positive change from when we first started. For the most part, she lets me know when she has to go potty. (Never thought I’d see that day.) There are still the occasional accidents here and there, but we’re only on the 5th day, so I’m not too worried. I have yet to go out in public with her because let’s be honest that sounds terrible at this moment. But I’m hoping within the next couple of days we can venture out.
I’m far from a potty training pro, but what I will say is that it does get better. (Along with every other phase of parenting).
I’ve had a great support system that has been there for any advice and to cheer us on along the way. They are all appreciated. Someday I’ll be able to look back at this and it will seem like it was easy compared to whatever the next parenting milestone will be. But for now, I’m definitely saying that potty training is the absolute worst.
Hang in there, mamas!