I’m Not Going to Step Out of My Comfort Zone


There are countless motivational sayings that urge people to step out of their “comfort zone.”

            “Do something every day that scares you.”

            “Get comfortable being uncomfortable.”

            “You are only confined by the walls you build yourself.”

            “Jump and the net will appear.”

These are just a few of these kinds of phrases that offer people a boost of motivation to add a little extra intention into their day. They become personal mantras that inspire people to push themselves further and help them achieve a better outlook on life.

I am sorry to say I am not one of those people.

Let me explain.

I’m all for people reaching for their goals in new and unexpected ways. I admire anyone who takes steps to live their best lives, who step outside of their comfort zone to better themselves. I have been, and will continue to be, their biggest cheerleader.

I, however, LOVE my comfort zone and have no plans to step out of it unless I must.

Make no mistake, though, I WILL have to step out of it…but not by choice. I’ve done things that scare me every day, and I can tell you they were not always voluntary. They were forced upon me through circumstances. And even though the experiences did make me stronger in some ways, they aren’t things I would have chosen for myself.

I’ve lived long enough to know that life throws us curve balls. It is unpredictable in some of the most wonderful ways. It is also unpredictable in the most devastating of ways. Illness, death, job loss, friend loss, betrayal, disappointment, devastation in our own lives and in the world at large, will jolt us out of any false sense of security we think we have.

That is why my “comfort zone” is so important to me. It’s my default position, my home base. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve taken risks in my life. I’ve taken chances in love, in my career, and in my friendships. I’ve set goals for myself and achieved some of them, and it felt good. All those experiences have enriched my life, made me a better person, and increased my confidence.

But now, in this current season of my life, I am extremely comfortable in my “comfort zone,” and I want to stay firmly planted there. I’m not “seeking” any more. I’m not “searching” any more. I’m not keeping score, and I realize no one else is either.

It’s liberating to be satisfied and not feel like I must prove anything to myself or anyone else. This isn’t to say that I don’t have things I want to do or experience. I’d like to be a grandmother someday. I’d like to go to Iceland. I’d like to see “Hamilton.” But if that never happens, I still feel like my life has turned out fine.

I’ve been married to the same man for 22 years. I’m raising two girls. I’ve experienced the loyalty of a pet. I’ve maintained friendships. I’ve made people laugh. I know I am a good person. I stand firmly in my beliefs in spirituality and politics. I know right from wrong. I’ve loved and been loved. I’ve achieved things. I’ve contributed in a small way to the world. I’ve also hurt and disappointed people, embarrassed myself, regretted decisions, and hit rock bottom.

In other words, I’ve lived life just like you. And while I wait for life in all its unpredictability to happen, as it surely will, I’m going to stand firmly in my comfort zone. I’ve spent 46 years carefully cultivating it, designing it, and building it, and I have no immediate plans to step out of it.

Are you living in your comfort zone? 


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