Four years ago I made the decision to retire from being a stay-at-home mom / in-home daycare provider. I was ready to go back to work.
I wrestled with the decision for a long time and ultimately decided it was time to put my over-priced piece of paper to use and return to the eight to five grind. Because how was I ever going to pay off my soul-crushing student loan debt if I didn’t have a decent paying job?
I went through every emotion under the sun and when I landed on my return-to-work decision, one big question remained… HOW? How was I going to make this work?
Going Back to Work
I was now the one looking into childcare, figuring out how I could get everyone where they needed to be, sad to be missing daytime events at the kids’ school, and feeling all the associated mom guilt you might expect.
The application and interview process was daunting. I was having a hard time getting interviews due to my gap in work history. Although I can assure you, if I can manage and wrangle five kids under five on a daily basis, I can manage just about anything. But nevertheless, I felt irrelevant and defeated.
I eventually started working with a local recruiter. She took the time to get to know me and what I was looking for in a company. That personal connection helped tremendously. She landed me an interview with a company she thought was a good fit, and she was right.
Today I continue to see post after post in online moms’ groups from women toying with the idea of re-entering the workforce. I always see TONS of comments about joining a multi-level marketing company (which I am not knocking so please don’t come for me), creating and selling stuff on Etsy, or finding some sort of side hustle.
I hardly ever see any practical advice for a working mom seeking traditional jobs or going through the application and interview process. While I very much appreciate and applaud those who hustle hard, I also have a soft spot for those who aren’t interested in any of that. Those who want to make a livable wage, work for a company they enjoy in a role they enjoy, bring home a steady paycheck, and still have time to unwind and spend time with their families.
Things to Look for in an Employer as a Working Mom
So for those seeking traditional employment opportunities, this one is for you!!
Here are five things to keep in mind as you’re going through the application and interview process.
1. What are their values?
Aligning your values with a potential employer will help set you up for success from the very beginning. If the company doesn’t value the same things you do, you’re most likely going to be unhappy in your role, even if it’s something you’re passionate about. Take some time to reflect on your values. Don’t be scared to ask the company about theirs. You’re just as much interviewing them as they are you. Don’t be afraid to ask questions.
2. What is their approach to employee wellbeing?
Do they have programming in place to support you as a person, not just as an employee? A fancy new laptop and an ergonomic chair will support you in your new role, sure, but creating and maintaining a safe and effective workplace goes beyond equipment, standard health insurance, and paid time off. Employee wellbeing should be as comprehensive and as unique as the employees. Think mental health services, social engagements, volunteer time off, paid parental leave, wellness days, growth opportunities, rewards for being proactive with your health, gym reimbursements, etc. Ask how they support their employees both personally and professionally.
3. Are they flexible?
What is the level of trust and flexibility when it comes to your potential role? If you or your children have a doctor’s appointment, are you able to take off? If there’s a school program it breaks your heart to miss, do they understand your family is your number one priority and you should absolutely block that time on your calendar to hear the most off-pitch choir concert in elementary school history?
4. Is this job something you can blend into your life?
I was riddled with anxiety at the thought of being everywhere I needed to be each day. How do I get from school drop off to work on time? And then get from one end of town to school pick-up to dance rehearsal all within the 30 minutes I have between my workday ending and evening activities beginning? Initially, I thought, “I don’t know, I’ll figure it out.” The reality is, time keeps marching on regardless of when you need it to pause, so “figuring it out” isn’t realistic.
It HAS to blend into your life. I hate the phrase work/life balance because my work is very much a part of my life. I’ve spent three and half years creating a work/life blend so my life isn’t separated into buckets, it’s just my life. My job and everything outside of it have to work together seamlessly for things to function. Spend some time identifying your non-negotiables. Once you’ve figured out what those are, make sure your prospective job opportunity doesn’t force you to compromise those. Losing sight of yourself and what’s truly important, will lead you down a rabbit hole of resentment and eventually back to the job search process.
5. Does it feel right in your gut?
Pretty simple right? Trust your gut! If something feels off, it probably is. And not the bad sushi or regrettable amount of Ben & Jerry’s off, but truly off. Comb back through the information you’ve gathered, create a pro/con list (I LOVE a good list), identify the pain points that are tripping you up, and if they are things that can’t be changed or negotiated, continue your search.
Ultimately, do your research and be selective. Ask questions, know your worth, and truly understand what it is you NEED and WANT in an employment opportunity. Once you know those things, go out and get it!
In case no one has told you lately, I believe in you! But I’m also a stranger on the internet, so let me just say, I hope YOU believe in YOU too!
You’re worth it, you’ve got this, and GOOD LUCK!
